Thursday, August 29, 2013

Still feeling it

Right now it's 10:28pm and I'm ready for bed, typing this on my phone. 

Well, actually I'm not totally ready for bed. You see, I'm sitting up watching episodes of Royal Pains on OnDemand waiting for Mr. Big to get home. 

He's working late tonight and will have to work even earlier tomorrow. 

I never expected this to be honest. I never thought that this would be my life. 

Remember how yesterday I wrote about being content? Well, this is part of being content. 

This is a new life different from the future I envisioned when I was 16, 25, even 28.

But it is a good life.  

I have six beautiful children who fill my heart with so much love and joy. They teach me new things every day even when they are not around. Their smiles and laughter remain in my memory and their stories are on repeat holding me off until my next time with them. They are an integral part of my life and I count the stars with the miracles they have given me and the kisses and smiles they share with me. 

I have a man by my side who has given me a new lease on life and helped me find the me that I thought was long gone. He kisses me every morning before he leaves for work and smiles a smile that melts my heart. He takes care of me and allows me to take care of him. 

Which brings me back to where I am now, contentment. 

I'll sit here and probably fall asleep on the couch waiting for him to come home. 

I'll probably dream of my time with my children to come this weekend and then wake up to see Mr. Big arrive home and usher me to bed and kiss me goodnight. 

And he will smile at me and I will feel content in knowing once more that things are good and I'm blessed. 

Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Feeling Content

All I can say, is I am feeling content and that things are falling into place in better ways than I imagined.

There are still hurdles to jump and mountains to climb but for now, I'm content....

I took this picture when I was on my way to go pick up my babies on Sunday

Monday, August 26, 2013

Good things people! Good things!!

Okay, I know I said I was back but then I didn't post anything...

Well, that's because it has been crazy busy (in my head, in life, everywhere) and a good reason for it!!

One thing is that what I was thought wasn't going to happen actually is!!

A few weeks ago I posted about going back to school and some of you I spoke with found out it was for nursing.

Then on FB and Twitter I posted that it fell through because the advisor that I spoke with gave me the wrong information and that the only night classes were the co-requisites not the core classes - those are only during the day and well, I work full time so unless I wanted to be a stripper and work at night, that was not an option.

Well, I was crushed and wondering WTF am I going to be when I grow up?!

And then I get the email that I thought was never going to come...

The one telling me that my real dream (nursing was dream #2 since #1 didn't seem feasible anymore) is within my reach.

Where I live there are limited to no resources but we do have ABA therapy - and in order for me to join the ranks of a BCBA I would need to go back to school which wold then require supervisory hours - well, at first there was no way to get supervisory hours unless I wanted to move to the main land - then we found a way (the university and I) and then the paperwork fell through and I got discouraged but then...the email came.

The BCBA that was willing to do the supervisory hours for me when the time comes turned all of her paperwork in to the university!!!

This means I can go back to school and finally get the degree and certification that compliments my other degree and make a difference that I want to make!!

Woo Hoo!!

And then on top of it all, on the same day actually I was given the opportunity to start a local Train 4 Autism chapter in my area!!


I couldn't believe it!!

So my mind has been spinning with excitement and all different kinds of good natured emotions and happy happy joy joy that I haven't been back to blog.

But I am here I am reading - even though I'm not commenting on everything - I am here.

I promise to be better since the high is finally calming down.

Oh, do me a favor - go ahead and go to my new page for T4A and like it and spread the word??

Here - Train 4 Autism: Southernmost Chapter

Oh and you know what is even cooler? I get business cards!!! That means its real and official peeps!! I've never had business cards - like EVER!!!

Here, have a drink and celebrate with me!!

"Woman Holding Cocktail Glass" by Ambro

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Back With Guns Blazing!

Hey there people!!

I know I have been gone and completely non-existant for a while and its not that I don't love you, I totally do but I had family over and then life just got in the way.

I had a total recap post prepared in my head for today but once again, life took over and I didn't write it and forgot most of what I was going to say. It was totally hilarious I swear to you!! I'll write it soon, maybe even on Friday - we'll see.

But then I came across this promotion of A&Es new show "Modern Dads"

(I think I'm safe on the picture because its a screen shot of my computer so it is "my image" because I did create it and it has all the link information, etc on it so "fingers crossed" - I didn't alter it either so whatevs)

I have been seeing the commercials for this show for a while now and I am totally interested in seeing it.

Dads are awesome.

Dads rock!

Even the Ex is a great dad - he may not be the best Ex in the world but I know he loves our monkeys and will do anything and everything for them - even if I might not agree with his methods or ideas, I know at the heart of it he is doing what he thinks is best for them.

It is not easy being a stay-at-home dad.

Some men get criticized as being lazy for it.

This is far from the truth...well, in most cases anyways. There is no need to generalize or stereo-type because honestly, we don't know what happens behind closed doors but really..if they are at home and the kids are fed and still breathing - its a good day. Just like it would be for a stay at home mom.

What got me blazing were the comments.

I was amazed at the harsh criticism that was posted in response - the majority of the comments were negative and just plain wrong! Look, see for yourself....

"Modern?ha! No thanks I'm not into the gay parent thing would rather watch married with children"

" Did they ever do a show where there was Mom's and kids...WTH is so Big about a stay at home Dad? why do they need Praise, and a TV show! Women get told its Not a Job staying home with kids. But to a Man it is a Job and they have this Big thing that it is a JOB and they are the Greatest and better than a MOM at it. I am not watching it, I am boycotting it in the NAME OF ALL MOMS LIKE ME< that got told it was NO big deal, and not a Job. And society ignores us Women at all cost!"

"get a night job you want to stay home all day be a man! i hope to god these arent college graduates?!"

"A bunch of pussified guys having their balls busted by their loud fat obnoxious wives"

"This are not real Modern Dads, this are what u call Lazy Dads. Real Modern Dads WORK and care for there KIDS. REAL Dads do all that and work!"

Where has our society gone?!? Really?

I think its a great idea! Its important to show that dads can be great stay at home parents too and that moms have the right and ability to go into the workplace if they want to.

The final seconds of episode 1 have not seen the light of day yet and people are already putting it down and the idea of stay-at-home fathers is being rubbed into the dirt along with it.

All I know is that I know I couldn't be a stay-at-home parent. Its not in me.

It does not mean that I love my children any less or that I am unfit to parent, it means that I need balance in order to be the best parent that I can be. That is why the Ex stayed home with the monkeys and I went to work.

I felt safer and more relaxed knowing that my children were being cared for by their father instead of a stranger at a day care while I was blowing away money to have someone essentially raise my children for me.

I'm also not going to criticize those families that do choose to have both parents working because each family is different and I applaud you all for making the decisions that you have made for your family.

My family is not conventional by any means and I would never want to criticize you for your choices in raising your children. Some day care centers are great and have amazing opportunities for children. Unfortunately the ones in my area that did offer that would require a down payment and a yacht and 3 pints of blood and 4 years worth of my salary to do so.

I guess what I am saying is....give it a chance...its important to see another side of parenthood and life.

Our communities are changing and the family dynamics are no longer the same.

Oh and I have to give a shot out to the Real Husbands of Autism....these guys are so awesome that I have to say I have a crush on every single one of them - a completely innocent one so the wives don't have to worry but yeah, to me, they are all hot for being some of the most rock-awesome dads out there.

Check them out and let them know I sent ya!! Total shameless blog plugging is appreciated ;-)

Friday, August 16, 2013

This Post Has Way More Burrito References Than I Intended

Here is my Jennifer #2...after much technical difficulties we were finally able to get this post submitted for your enjoyment. This Jennifer aka Steenky is just the best!! She is all kinds of awesome who listened to me complain about my divorce while I was on the treadmill all the while encouraging me to keep on going and making me laugh with stories about family and bad hair. I love her and here, this is just a little bit of why....
Oh, boy. This is going to be rough. I haven’t written anything “just for fun” for almost 4 years, unless, of course, you count the things I scrawl on the bathroom walls at work. I used to have a space carved out on the internet that I called my own over at It’s still up, kicking up dust, but my thoughts don’t live there anymore. They’re in my head, unwritten, often unheard and taking up space. Space that I desperately need in order to remember to pack the kiddos their school lunches or their names or where we’re even driving.
True story, late last week I was driving my two children home from a day at the pool. I was listening to and enjoying their endless chatter about My Little Pony this and My Little Pony that, when I suddenly found myself in a Rancherito’s Burritos parking lot. (Local greasy Mexican food chain. Delicious. Did I mention it’s delicious?) I honestly had no idea how I arrived there. Did I black out on the drive? More importantly, did I still have that buy-one-get-one free coupon in the console? That night was confusing. Delicious, but confusing.
I gave up the internet to become more present at home (but not in the car, apparently). I don’t think my family ever considered me “absent” or gone really, but the important things like my husband, my kids, and Ryan Lochte’s abs needed immediate attention.
But, as I mentioned earlier, my lack of online outlet has caused me to have a head full of jumbled thoughts and often a tummy full of gas. (hint: burrito) I admire anyone that can maintain his or her rock star online presence and not wear stretchy pants all the time because, I couldn’t. I couldn’t do it all. Well, I could, I just needed spandex to do it.
As of late, I’ve placed myself on a Facebook fast as well. I haven’t been on in two weeks with the exception of checking the private messages that pop up. So, as you might imagine, the total lack of social media interaction has been a bit of a change for me. It’s weird not being able to type into a tiny box what I’m feeling today, even if what I’m feeling today is excitement about something totally benign like finally uncovering the mystery smell in the car (double hint: it was a burrito, again).  Or posting about the important things like declaring myself undecided on this whole spring trend of brightly colored skinny jeans for men. It’s August already. (Get it together, Jen!)
I guess, what I’m trying to say is that I’m awfully glad I got a chance here today to dip my toe back into the online world, even if it was just for a moment. I’m already feeling the fog lift from my thought-congested head. I’m doubly glad it could be on this wonderful place that my dear friend Krystal has created. I’m so very proud of her and I love her to bits. We’ve shared laughs, secrets and a few tears. But we’ve never shared a burrito. We ought to change that, don’t you think?

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Parental Guidance Suggested

Remember on yesterday's post I told you about my guest Jennifer-bloggers for my time away? Well, here the fist one. Jennifer or as we used to refer to her in the blogosphere, "Sprite's Keeper". She was one of the first bloggers I ever read - like ever - and because of her, I actually started to write my own. Yes lady, its because of you!! I bet you didn't know that did you? So here she is for all of you to enjoy and love as much as I do...

Jen, - thanks for coming out of the woodwork for me. I love you! 

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

I haven’t written an entry for my blog in 7 months. I’m not sure how deeply the dust has settled and I’m afraid to log on and look. It’s not like anyone’s left nasty comments on posts from five years past; I had circumvented trolls long ago by limiting comment capabilities to two weeks.

So why start writing again now?

Well? Someone asked me nicely. (I always respond well to flattery.)

I’ve known Krystal for almost as long as I’ve been blogging, and we played in the same blogosphere playground for a while, visiting each other’s lives, or, the lives we chose to show to the reading public, celebrating and grieving with each other depending on the subject matter. So, when she asked me to submit a post, any subject matter, any length, “Hey, how about a poem for old time’s sake?”

I agreed.

My site, rhymes included, was mostly about the upbringing of my own daughter, Sprite; however, as Sprite’s voice grew louder and more opinionated, my desire to act as her voice ebbed. My imagination was no longer necessary; she usurped her own throne from me, asking nicely, of course. She does like to read through my stories once in a while, and get an insider’s outsider’s (it actually makes sense if you think about it) view of her mind when she was too young to verbalize it herself, plus it’s vindicating for me to see how I read her so accurately back then. Anyone who knows her now can match who and how she is to anything I’ve written.

I’m proud of that.

My story telling has now morphed into thirty second Facebook status reads. The 140 character limit on Twitter never appealed to me, but the audience on Facebook consists of family and friends, people I want to tell my stories to anyway, so I’m at peace with where my once sort of popular blog has settled.

But that’s not what I want to write about.

I want to write about death. Sorry, if there was a way to rephrase that, I would, but the word death, such a soft sounding word, is blunt in its irony.

Sprite, at six years old, (six and a half if you’re asking her directly) has experienced loss three times now.

The first time, it was our beagle, Blue. Of the two dogs we had at the time, Blue was the one who loved Sprite wholly from the minute we brought our infant home. Last October, we found out, literally with no time to process it, that she was losing the battle to an aggressive tumor. Sprite and I walked in to the vet’s office, thinking she was dealing with old dog issues, and walked out two hours later, with just her collar. I was almost inconsolable, and so worried with how Sprite would respond to the loss, being that she would tell everyone and anyone how Blue was her best friend.

She barely reacted other than to question how she wouldn’t have two dogs anymore.

Oh, she claimed to be sad about it, and days later, expressed her desire for a new puppy since our other dog Harry barely tolerated her, (they’ve been working on their relationship ever since, he’s now somewhat accepting of her affections, until she pisses him off..) but I had seen more tears and sorrow over the loss of a treat due to bad behavior, so I wasn’t sure how she was really processing it.

A month later, she would break into tears spontaneously, crying out, “I don’t want to get old! I don’t want to die!” (I do remember having these exact fears myself when I was her age. Hell, I still do.) My husband and I did our best to soothe her, while, inevitably admitting, yes, we all will die eventually. Why lie and tell her she is special, she will never succumb to the laws of mortality that overrule everyone else’s wishes? I want to ease her fears, not give her a false rainbow.

After a few weeks of these outbursts, she simply stopped mentioning it.

In March of this year, we lost a dear family friend, my adopted grandmother, Ellie. Ellie had been a wonderful presence in Sprite’s life since John and I announced our pregnancy. In fact, Ellie crocheted her baby blanket, Sprite’s prized possession and closest naptime ally. As Ellie’s illness progressed quickly, Sprite grew afraid of visiting, even at her young age, she knew Ellie wasn’t feeling well. When I got the news early that morning of her passing, I had to tell her. She bowed her head in sadness, but then brightened up by saying, “She’ll get to see Blue!”

Not long after we lost Ellie, Ellie’s husband, Sonny, or Papa Sonny, was diagnosed with Cancer. His own health began fading fast. We weren’t surprised, he himself would say that every day he lived without Ellie was too long for him, but still, to lose anyone, no matter how expected, is still painful.

He passed away last Thursday. I found out at Sprite’s bedtime, when we were recounting her first day in first grade. Breaking the news to her, she exclaimed sadness, and hugged me tightly as I cried. When I pulled back, she asked if I was sad. Confirming this, I asked her the same question.

“I’m sad because he died, but I know he’s happy. He’s with Mama Ellie now. That’s what he wanted, right?”

She sounded so mature about it, she actually made me feel better. How can a six year old be so mature about death?

The funeral is this Friday. She’s repeatedly asked to come to the funeral. I’m so torn on this.

On one hand, she’s shown a lot of maturity, and even empathy; she used an offer of holding my tissues for me as a bargaining tool to gain admittance to this closed (at least to minors) event,  saying she would sit quietly, and remember him for how he was, and how he will always be in her memory.

On the other hand, no other children will be coming. Not even those children who are of his actual bloodline. Only the adults will be in attendance. Naturally, she’s invited to the gathering (or Shiva) afterwards, where all the kids will be in attendance, but she’s not happy with that answer.

She wants to be there to see him off. But is she too young?

Personally, I think so. There’s just something so final about a funeral, something even a Disney cartoon can’t fix, and I would rather expose her to the closeness of family at Shiva, when we gather to remember his values, his virtues, even the stories he probably wouldn’t want repeated, and of course, the laughter that comes with celebrating someone we love. I was seven when my paternal grandmother passed away. My maternal grandmother watched me that day of the funeral. Two years later, I wasn’t at my maternal grandmother’s funeral, my parents still thought me too young.

The first funeral I went to was at the tender age of thirteen, when my great grandfather died. I handled it fine. When my maternal grandfather died the summer of my sixteenth year, I did NOT handle that well. So, I could make the argument that age is not a factor in dealing with death, maturity is. So, score one for Sprite’s side of the debate.

Unfortunately, the scorekeeper in this battle of age versus maturity is time.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Better Hostesses

Okay people, I know, I have been totally slacking here this week.

But I have a good reason for it!

Mr. Big's sister is in town and I'm focused with being a good hostess with the mostess so I'm sory that my hosting duties to you have well, fallen by the way side.

But I do cherish you all...really I do!

So since I have been so crappy, I am going to let some other wonderful ladies lead you into the weekend and host my blog for two days.

These true hostesess with the mostesses are my guest Jennifer-bloggers.


Yes, guest Jennifer-bloggers.

You see, these are 2 mommy bloggers who no longer blog but are still awesome and wonderful friends of mine from way back in the day of old school blogging - and even better, they are both named Jennifer!!

No, its not the same person, trust me.

Jennifer - aka Sprite's Keeper is on the East Coast and happily married with one beautiful little girl who was the center of her blog world over at Sprite's Keeper (hence her name, duh!). Since she no longer blogs, I stalk her via FB and just smile and laugh at the tidbits she continues to share with us. She is a true friend and always has something nice to say. You can check her out as her page is still open so you can see why I fell in awe-luv with her (yes, click on the link - your computer won't blow up or anything).

Jennifer - aka Steenky is somewhere living in a sisterwives commune in Utah...actually, no she's not - I just make fun of that with her. She is also one of my loveliest and dearest friends who used to blog but no longer does because she spends time caring for her 3 children - her son and daughter and of course, her husband, all while managing her crazy hair. She used to blog over at Steenky Bee and that is where I fell in awe-luv with her as well. Check her out too - even though its outdated she is still all kinds of cool.

These ladies will hold down the fort for me and you will get a taste of why I think they are so great and why I am so glad that they are still in my life and two of the greatest ladies out there - so much that I'm jealous I'm not a Jennifer too!

And of course, I have to leave you with some eye candy in advance because I can't be rude.

Adventures in Extreme Parenthood

So here is you Special Needs Ryan Gosling dose for the
week - courtesy of the ever awesome SN Ryan series with Sunday at Adventures in Extreme Parenthood who allows us this break from the insanity of special needs parenting and allows us to laugh at ourselves all while drooling over the steamy that is Ryan Gosling

Friday, August 9, 2013

Taking me Back and a Hottie to Boot!

Have you ever forgotten what you used to look like before you had kids? I know I did!

I seem to think I have always looked like this but not true!

We were once young children and teenagers before we became the hot mommies that we are now.

So as I was thinking about how to participate in this week's SN Ryan Gosling series over at Adventures in Extreme Parenthood I decided to clean and rearrange my house.

Adventures in Extreme Parenthood

I get my best ideas when I'm cleaning. Also, I needed to because if you remember last week, Mr. Big and I were having a discussion about when his sister arrives which is now THIS Saturday so I have to make the house look presentable.

As I was cleaning, I came across this picture....

My Sister, My Brother, and ME!!

Wow!! That 14 years ago exactly yesterday at my brother's first wedding. I can't believe I was ever that young or looked like that! I still remember when I bought that dress.

I was in a small mall in Buckinghamshire England looking for something to wear to Her Majesty's Theater to go watch Phantom of the Opera for the first time. I studied at a boarding school, Wycombe Abbey, in Buckinghamshire for about a month during the summer when I was 16 in a course offering on Sir Thomas Moore by the University of Dallas (they don't offer this anymore). I was the only student from Florida! Wow - definitely takes me back!! (There were guys there - the school was closed for the summer but we were used it as our dorm - the boys got the 3rd floor and the girls got the 2nd floor). I have to say that was one of the best trips in my life!! Too bad my photo album got damaged when I had a water leak in my old apartment. It was ruined!! :-(

After I posted that picture on FB my cousin then posted this one of me as a toddler...

Here, have a ball. It says "2"
Wasn't I just the cutest? I can't believe I was ever that little!! And those rolls on my arms and legs!! And the dress!! Holy crap!!

Time flies by doesn't it? 

Now I am looking over required reading lists for Princess because she still has one more book to read and school starts like SOON and she doesn't know which one to read.

I remember when I was the one reviewing the lists for myself and doing book reports at the last minute because I wanted to get every ounce of summer in that I possibly could.

Now, its my children doing the same thing....


So, I gotta get back to it and since I promised you a hottie (no, not my brother - that's just gross people!) here you go....

Thursday, August 8, 2013

Picking Six

What is it with the sudden need to learn more about people? Seriously?

What happened to just walking in to your house and shutting away the outside?

I'm just joking...

I love people and sharing about myself - only when asked of course.

Luckily for you, I have been asked!! Yay!!

The ever so adorable Desiree Macke over at Macke Monologues has requested I join in the Pick Six fun. She is all kinds of cute and sweet and girl-next-door perfect that I couldn't say no. If you haven't checked her out yet, you so totally should - she is awesome and her little guy is just waaayyy too cute!!! He's yummy and you just wanna squish him. 

Okay, I think I've gushed over the Desiree a bit too much so now onto me...

Here are the six questions I picked along with their answers...

1) What is your Favorite TV Show?

That one is easy!! I would have to say Criminal Minds. There is something about the way that the characters of the BAU can solve the most heinous of crimes and all by profiling the personalities of the criminals. Aside from my children's autism, this is another reason why I chose to study psychology. The show made me curious of human behavior.

Oh and of course - who could forget the eye candy. I think all the men on this show are hot in their own way... see...

SSA Dr. Spencer Reid - aka Matthew Gray Gubbler

SSA Derek Morgan - aka Shemar Moore

Unit Director Aaron "Hotch" Hotchner aka Thomas Gibson

SSA Supervisor David Rossi aka Joe Mantegna
Bonus: Mantegna's eldest daughter Mia has autism and therefore he is double awesome in my eyes!!

2) Tell us something we don't know about you:

Well, unless you're family you wouldn't know that I studied classical languages in high school. For 4 years I took French, German, Latin, and Ancient Greek. I can understand most people when they speak in French if they talk slowly enough. I can get a generalization of conversations in German. I can tell you that "Equus" is the word for "horse" in Latin. I can recite the "Our Father" prayer in Greek as well as read the alphabet and recite classical poems in the original language. I don't have use for these languages now and I think the only thing I can say if I needed to in France or Germany is "May I go to the rest room?"

3) What's your favorite beauty secret or product?

Since I have curly hair and live on an island where humitdity is almost always guaranteed, the frizz sometimes makes me look like a crazy woman. Therefore I use this...

If it weren't for this perfect product, I don't know what I would do with my hair. Actually all of my hair care products are Garnier - even when I dye my hair I use Garnier. These products have done me well.

4) Share one of your favorite pics. Tell us why it is your favorite.

This is my favorite picture because it is one of the first pictures of Mr. Big and I ever!!! I love how we are both smiling even while we are kissing....I never had that before in a relationship so it reminds me of how good things are with him.

5) Who inspires you?

Well, that one is easy - my children!  These little people have overcome more in their lives than most kids should ever have to and they are growing and thriving because of it. I couldn't have a bigger source of inspiration than the six little amazing angels in my life.
This picture is so cute I had to post it again

6) What have you learned about being married?

Well, I'm no longer married but I did learn a lot from it. I learned that being married shouldn't mean that you have to change. The person that you are with married you because they loved you for who you are and if they ask you to change - then they didn't marry you for the right reasons. I have taken that lesson into my relationship with Mr. Big and so far it seems to work. We are not married and I don't think we ever will (that's a whole other debate I don't want to get into right now) but we are together because we like who we are as individuals and when we are together. There is nothing about him that I want to change and there is nothing about me that he wants to change. We grow together as a couple and take each other into consideration but we still maintain our own individuality and identities aside from that which makes us a couple. This is my second chance and I think with the lessons learned from my marriage - I think I'm doing something right.

So, now here is the best part - I'm passing the fun along to the following six awesome people. Just pick six questions from the list below and answer them on your blog.

1. What is one of your silly quirks? Or something silly that you get excited about.
2. Favorite movie, song, or tv show?
3. Any funny stories to share that has happened recently?
4. Tell us something we don't know about you.
5. What's your favorite beauty secret or product?
6. What's your favorite or go-to outfit? (pics please)
7. What's a personal trial you had to overcome?
8. What's a current dream that you are hoping to achieve?
9. What's the coolest thing you've made? (food, craft, anything)
10. Who or what inspires you?
11. Share one of your favorite pics. Tell us why it's your favorite
12. What's your favorite part about marriage? Or what have you learned since becoming married?

It's nice to get to know you and for you to get to know me - now go away!

I'm just kidding, totally stick around, I like you - just don't leave a mess - this floor is a bitch to clean!

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

What was I saying?

My mind isn't working well today....

I wonder why.

Joining in with Sunday at Adventures in Extreme Parenthood and the SNRyan Gosling Series....

Adventures in Extreme Parenthood

I don't think I'm going to get anything accomplished today....

Check out the rest of the entries here...get a towel first - you'll not only be drooling but laughing as well!

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

The Good Side of Autism

I know that there are moments where autism can just consume and overwhelm one's life...

The day to day, the non-stop worrying and jumping and everything that you as a parent do to stay on alert and give your child what he/she needs can sometimes be exhausting and draining. You sometimes pray for bedtime just to get a break and even then its not a real break because you're still on alert in case your child starts to walk out of his/her room or gets sick in the middle of the night.

It never ends.

Even for me - and my kids live full-time with their dad & step-mom.

On visitation days I cram activities, discipline, education, and therapy all into a few hours. When they are not with me I'm constantly checking my phone for updates or making sure I have signal in case of an emergency.

So much that I had an anxiety episode this passed week because my old cell phone was not working and I was scared something with the kids was going to happen and they wouldn't be able to reach me.

I have since replaced the phone - I am officially an iPhone user now - goodbye Android!!

Well, back to the point...

Autism never ends for the families - no matter where the children are, it never ends.

But this weekend I was reminded of the good side of autism.

Yes, there is a good side.

Like this...

I love watching Silly spin. He is just content in his little world. Did you see that smile on his face?! It was priceless!! That is the innocence and perfection of autism.

And this....

Silly loves to sing! That is when his voice comes out and you can hear him. He is a child of very little words but when a song connects with him, he just sings. Remember this video I posted before?  Yes, he is just amazing. Music is his connection. (That giggle in the background - that was Baby Girl. I love her giggles!)

And then there is this...

Isn't it amazing how he can do this? Buddy can script any episode of any television show (generally though it is Thomas and Friends), word for word, with perfect rhythm - he even makes the train sounds (I bet you didn't catch that did you?). It puts me in awe every time! -- the video was actually longer but I couldn't email the whole thing from my phone so I had to send myself a shortened version. I'll try to get the full one up soon.

Then you have Monkey who just laughs with abandon at the silliest of things and wants to learn everything that is going on around him.

And Bug who just draws and draws and can tell you all about the different Jagers from Pacific Rim and the sharks and dinosaurs and so many other things. He is a pool of knowledge.

Yes, autism is not all negative...even when it seems like it is, its not.

Monday, August 5, 2013

Finding the Balance

Well, I have to admit, my last few posts have not been at all that pleasant to read.

I've been griping and bitching left and right.

But, well, that's what this blog is for - its to let out all that is going on in my head.

The good, the bad, the funny, and the sad.

This weekend though, I found my balance.

I'm back at even and I'm so happy for it.

I had a good day with the kids on Saturday - I even captured some awesome moments on video that I'm going to share with you all, but not today, tomorrow.

It's better to keep you waiting for those goodies.

But today I'm going to share this with you...

The clouds over the water were just amazing

And this....
I LOVE this picture!!

Oh and this...
I love how the sun and clouds reflected on the water -
it was a perfect mirror!
Yesterday when Mr. Big came home, we decided to head out on the boat and just ride. He needed to break-in the engine since he just got the lower unit repaired and we couldn't ask for better weather.

We spent a few hours on the water.

He trolled (sp?) a lure behind us while we just enjoyed the scenery and each other's company.

We were amazed at how many lobster traps were already set out. The floating-buoy thingies (see how technical I can be!) were everywhere dotting the water line ready for lobster season to officially open tomorrow.

It was a perfect end to a hectic week.

I found my balance again.

On Saturday with my children and closed if off last night at dinner with my love.

I remembered once again how lucky I am. Even during the hard times and moments where I just want to scream and cry.

I'm lucky. I have so much in my life.

Like him...
All scruffy & inked - just my kind of man

And even more....THEM....

My little fish

Who could ask for more?

Friday, August 2, 2013

Scared Sh!tless

I was recently reading the many blogs on my Potential Handbooks tab and came across this post from the talented and ever awesome Jillsmo about the Digital Millennium Copyright Act and it scared the shit out of me.

You see, I have uploaded some images that weren't mine.

I always cited the source to make sure that where I was getting the images from was properly recognized but even doing that is not legal!!

I honestly thought that citing sources like when writing a paper in High School would cover my ass when it came to plagiarism/copyright infringement but apparently not.

In her post she mentioned this article where a photo with a copyright was used and ended up costing the company $3,000 (the original request was $8,000) because they didn't know the copyright laws.

It can happen to you!

It can happen to me!

Heck, I know I can't risk a few thousand dollars - hell, I can't risk $5.00 so I have taken down all the photos that I have not taken myself and replaced them with this...

You can use this image - I give you permission :-)

I admit my guilt and my stupidity.

In the article, the writer Kari DePhillips details the following:

Current Fair Use image copyright laws say that you’re financially liable for posting copyrighted images, even if: 
• You did it by accident
• You immediately take down the picture after receiving a DMCA takedown notice 
• The picture is resized
• If the picture is licensed to your Web developer (Getty Images requires that you get your own license, thank you very much)
• You link back to the photo source and cite the photographer’s name
• Your site isn’t commercial and you make no money from your blogs
• You have a disclaimer on the site
• The pic is embedded instead of saved on your server
• You found it on the Internet

From now on, I will be using Royalty Free images or my own or maybe even take a page from Jillsmo and draw my own - THAT will be funny as I can't draw worth my life.

Also, make sure that when you do upload YOUR OWN images, put a watermark on them in a place that is not easily removed via crop or editor - it might make your images look a little wonky but atleast your stuff is protected.

(It's still safe to create memes like the one above because they are granting you the permission to do it through their create your own option - this way you are doing it safely)

We have too much to worry about as it is - don't risk it.

Our kids' college and therapy funds depend on us.

Note: I have added a few Royalty Free Photo sites onto my Potential Handbooks tab if you're looking for some.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

This, or Last, or Next???

Okay - I was having a debate with Mr. Big yesterday about when his sister comes to town.

Last time we saw her was in 2011 when she turned 21 and I took her out drinking and she took pictures with random strangers because she is just that awesome and I love her to death because she just makes the world a better place...

See, isn't she adorable?

Sister Big and Me August 2011 <3

Well, anyways...our debate was when she was coming.

Not so much the date because we both know its August 10th but this...

Me: "Your sister will be here next weekend"

Mr. Big: "No she won't"

Me: "Yes, she'll be here on the 10th"

Mr. Big: "That's not next weekend"

Me: "Yes it is! This weekend coming up - like in 3 days is this weekend. Therefore the weekend of the 10th is next weekend."

Mr. Big: "Nope"

Me: "YES! - the weekend that passed is last weekend because its behind us! The weekend of this week is this weekend and the one coming up is next weekend!!"

Mr. Big: "Nope"

Me: Stewing in silence

So people, tell me who is right? - because really, I need to be right! I'm never right!

But I will accept it if I'm wrong - I really will...but I really want to be right!!